Well, there we were.
Just two people with two very strong opinions. Both refusing to budge. Neither of us able to see how we could possibly meet in the middle.
Me, firmly with the belief that my 7-year-old should brush his teeth for 2 minutes, twice a day.
Him, with the equally firm belief that he doesn’t need to brush his teeth because he finds it “boring and doesn’t want to”.
How could we possibly find common ground?
You’d think we would have by now, with this standoff being an almost daily occurrence.
It makes me think of the internal battle we all have about doing the things we know are good for us, but we just really don’t feel like doing.
Maybe you’ve even tried some of the same strategies my 7-year-old uses to get out of brushing his teeth? Things like:
- Complaining that he’s too tired.
- Convincing me he doesn’t have time because there’s too much other stuff he wants to do.
- Claiming he can’t find his toothbrush.
- Saying it hurts and he doesn’t like the taste.
Maybe the other voice in your head (or maybe even a health professional) has tried some of the same strategies I’ve used with him? I’ve tried:
- Explaining why it’s good for him.
- Trying scare tactics by reminding him of the possible consequences of not brushing.
- Bargaining with him by giving him the night off and making him promise to do 4 minutes in the morning.
- Just doing it for him.
But at the end of the day, the teeth still need to be brushed. And just like that nightly battle, we all have our own internal standoff when it comes to exercise, eating well, or doing the things we know are good for us.
I talk a lot about self-compassion around here—about not beating ourselves up when we’re struggling, about meeting our bodies where they’re at, and giving ourselves grace.
But here’s the thing: sometimes, we actually do just need a gentle kick up the butt. Sometimes, we need to just do the hard thing.
Just like my son’s teeth won’t clean themselves, the workout, walk, or whatever it is you’ve been putting off won’t happen unless you make it happen. You don’t need to love every minute of it, and it doesn’t always have to feel fun or easy. Sometimes, you have to push through the discomfort and do it anyway.
Because eventually, it gets easier. It becomes more automatic and less of a big deal, just like brushing your teeth is for us adults. We don’t love it, but we don’t fight it either—we just do it because we know the long-term benefit far outweighs the momentary discomfort.
So next time you’re in that internal standoff, remember that it’s okay to give yourself grace sometimes. But also know when it’s time to stop negotiating with yourself, get up, and just do the thing.